9/1/2004: “It’s my quinceañera, BITCH!” —something I shouted on the back of the bus
(This is the one photo I have from my quinceañera party in photo class! Walgreens ruined the rest of them.)
My dress has been attacked by sparkling grape juice, flan, and a Butterfinger. But my tiara and my combat boots are still shiny as ever.

By the way, everyone, thank you. I loved my notes and presents. Especially the mixtapes. And the Abortion Blanket. How much I love you all you just don’t know.

Thanks to everybody who danced with me in photo class today.

Thanks to my boys Charlie and Jake for dressing up and being my quinceañera maids. Charlie dazzled in his suit and tie, but Jake stole the show in Ali’s red velvet dress. You’re the best friends a girl could ask for.

And big fucking thanks who made this day the best birthday I’ve ever had.

Now. On to Joe’s Crab Shack!

And in this moment, I swear, I was cool with Manny Santos

8/29/2004: “He began talking to a stray cat for fifteen minutes.”

Last night’s episode of Forbidden Planet was dazzling. But I HAD to get off the phone with Danny to enjoy it. He was giving me some juicy gossip, until he began talking to a stray cat for fifteen minutes. I just wanted to listen to my music, ya’ know? So I told him I had to fix dinner, but called Marisol instead to complain.

…NOW you see why I don’t ever date boys outside of school. Speaking of. A Latino boy was blowing me kisses and [obviously] staring at my ass in the CD section at Walmart when I was looking for Buena Vista Social Club. He passed by the fifth time when I said, “Yo, you wanna hit on a girl, don’t do it at Walmart. Okay?”

I bought four bottles of sparkling grape juice and a tiara for my quince. YAY. Also, I will go around looking for a dance partner on Wednesday. If you’re interested, just grab me and twirl me around. We are working on the flan. *smile* So come in your Wednesday best, and be ready to dance. Badly.

puckish-thoughts:

THERE IT IS AGAIN!  THERE IT FUCKING IS!  i’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS PHOTO FOR YEARS AND NEVER COULD FIND IT!!  THE LAN PARTY WITH THE GUY DUCT-TAPED TO THE CEILING!!  BACK IN ANCIENT TIMES WHEN PEOPLE STILL USED CATHODE MONITORS AND WHEN COUNTERSTRIKE WAS THE NEW THING.  THIS SHIT IS REAL.  THIS IS REAL SHIT.  SHIT THAT HAPPENED.

But how did he get up there

puckish-thoughts:

THERE IT IS AGAIN!  THERE IT FUCKING IS!  i’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS PHOTO FOR YEARS AND NEVER COULD FIND IT!!  THE LAN PARTY WITH THE GUY DUCT-TAPED TO THE CEILING!!  BACK IN ANCIENT TIMES WHEN PEOPLE STILL USED CATHODE MONITORS AND WHEN COUNTERSTRIKE WAS THE NEW THING.  THIS SHIT IS REAL.  THIS IS REAL SHIT.  SHIT THAT HAPPENED.

But how did he get up there

Slipknot, “Duality”

I PUT MY FINGERS INTO MY AHHHHHHHHH

8/26/2004: Holy fuck. My first actual poem in months.

I’m brighter than most
Of the virginal stars.
A silhouette sinks under me
And it feels so very far.

I’ve worn your sympathy
I’m married off to the world.
I’m bleeding of bad thoughts
And toxic ruby pearls.

Withered ‘round the edges
I’m solid flesh and bone.
Petals of a past untold
Present constantly resewn.

Pass along the message
Across a silken wire.
I’d rather be the flame
Than fall into the fire.

I could take a sip of ether
But dreams are all I’d miss.
I’d never sleep ‘till I
Can taste your moonlit kiss.

Am I really fine without
The fairy tale ending?

catchmydrifthecancatchmyjizz said: All I can thing of is yung Suzy glaring at zizek

Funny you say that, Grown Me relentlessly scowled at Zizek once in college

The Soviettes, “#1 is Number Two” 

You’ll get left out if you reach the top
You’ll feel let down like you wanted more
You’ll get no love from the ones who should
Love you the most but they’re fading

8/26/2004: “They’re even fouler than old communist men.”

Mom and I had yet another verbal brawl. I can’t go to the lock-in with Danny and Amy tomorrow. Well. It kind of bothered me anyway that Danny invited me and not his current girlfriend. Am I just a side-piece to him?

I talked to my stepdad about it. Lately I’ve been feeling as if all the respect I have gained in this household has gone to rot. No one really gives a shit about my Quinceañera but my friends and my dad. My mom didn’t have one, so naturally she doesn’t give a flying fuck what I do. My stepdad must see this Quinceñera as something exotic, which is a good thing in my case. He made me feel better by insisting he will get me a tiara and materials for making flan on Wednesday. And my drawing teacher is burning me a copy of the Buena Vista Social Club CD.

My sister is pissing me off again by calling me “Sue” and ordering me to do the dishes. I might’ve been one (and a dumb one at that), but I hate pre-teens. They’re even fouler than old communist men.

I hate a lot of things.

im just here 2 tell u im ur new biggest fan

image

Remember these statement keychains from Spencer’s Gifts?

Remember these statement keychains from Spencer’s Gifts?

JoJo, “Leave (Get Out)”

It’s too late (now) and I can’t wait for you to be gone 
'Cause I know about her (who) and I wonder (why) how I bought all the lies

8/24/2004: Wearing nothing is divine, naked is a state of mind.

Today, despite my Misfits shirt and chunky combat boots, I felt so perfectly feminine that I’m in Lilith Fair mode. (See Luscious Jackson lyrics above?) Next is Liz Phair, then (if I can find it) some good ol’ Sarah McLachlan from the early 90’s. Then Tori Amos, of course.

Faux-Hitler, AKA my ex-boyfriend Adam, is one obnoxious pup. He keeps trying to fuck with me in the hallway by bumping his shoulder against me, but, I’m just ignoring him now. I’ve also been ignoring Blake, until he cracked a joke in drawing class and I laughed. No more of that.

I still can’t believe I kissed Diego yesterday. But it was just for fun, and I’m okay with that.

Kyle told me that I am always beautiful. We keep talking but now I hardly know what to say.

8/23/2004: FAST TIMES ON BUS 824

Today I got the most action I have gotten all year. In order to get two 8th grade lovebirds to make out, the whole back of Bus 824 engaged in some wild Truth or Dare— well, MINUS the Truth part. Nearly every single person playing got some action.

  1. The 8th Grade Lovebirds slipped the tongue and nibbled earlobes.
  2. Adam’s girlfriend and Marissa pop-kissed.
  3. The Token Rebel Girl with a mohawk gave the Token Black Guy a soft kiss.
  4.  A girl kissed the seat. (That’s still action!)
  5. And the beautiful junior I told you about, Diego, let me kiss him!

I told everyone, “What happens on the bus STAYS on the bus!” But you know everyone will go home and tell their friends.

This year, will no doubt be the spiciest year 824 has ever seen.